Monday, June 20, 2005

Mickey Loves Money

I'm in Orlando, Florida, on my pseudo-godfather's laptop; we've finally moved beyond dialup connections, and onward to the great promised land of wireless internet. Unfortunately, it's kind of hard to do photo-editing with a touch-pad. I tried for a bit, but totally gave up. Fortunately, we can always rely on google images:

'that's right... tell daddy to give me all your money'

For those of you bright sparks who have yet to catch on, I'm scheduled for a visit to the magic kingdom tomorrow. Let me tell you, these play-dates with Mickey and friends don't come cheap. A one-day 'magic your way' pass will set you back US$59.75 per adult. Seeing as to how they define 'adults' as anyone aged 10 and above, I suppose a large proportion of those paying adult fares in the disney theme parks would have barely gotten used to the fact that they're no longer sperm. For a party of five, this comes up to about US$300. Couple this with the fact that there are FOUR disney theme parks in Orlando - The Magic Kingdom, Epcott Center, MGM-Studios and Animal Kingdom, as well as the fact that each ticket only gets you into ONE of these parks, and you're looking at spending a small fortune paying these bastards for the pleasure of waiting in line. We're in Orlando for 3 and a half days, which means we're looking at US$900 to Mickey's bank book. Is it just me, or is this a lot of money?

I've been to plenty of theme parks. You might think that the hefty fees would keep the crowds at bay, but, unsurprisingly, they don't. I was recently at six flags, and in the 4 hours I was there, we managed to get on a grand total of 4 rides. I know, fantastic, right? Given that I spend, say, ten hours, and sit on, say, 10 rides, that will be roughly 6 bucks per ride. Thus, I will be lining up an hour to pay 6 bucks for each ride.

There's obviously a cheaper way - I could always buy a 'magic your money away' pass for 3 days - this would cost US$171 per adult, and would save us a whopping 10 bucks each. Oh, joy. Considering I also want to go to Universal Studio's 'Islands of Misadventure', so that I can give them my money as well, I suppose I'll pass.

So, the question remains, why the hell am I putting myself through this?

The answer, of course, is that Daddy's paying. You're only a parasite for so long, you know, and I plan to make the most of it. If my kids want to get on a magic roller coaster, though, I'll just drive real fast through Genting highlands. Given my wonderful driving skills, that would be scarier than any rollercoaster. I figure my parents have given disney enough money for one lifetime.


Blogger Ah 9 spewed forth...

Speeding round the hills of Genting is not only dangerous but exhilarating. Haha

20/6/05 07:46  
Blogger zhi yang spewed forth...

japan's disneyland isn't any better.

20/6/05 10:03  
Blogger Gabrielle spewed forth...

its a once in a lifetime thingy lah.

that's how disney empty ur wallet dry.. speaking of which.. why are they getting richer and their cartoons getting poorer??

too rich to try to entertain us anymore?

20/6/05 10:35  
Blogger Gabrielle spewed forth...

its a once in a lifetime thingy lah.

that's how disney empty ur wallet dry.. speaking of which.. why are they getting richer and their cartoons getting poorer??

too rich to try to entertain us anymore?

20/6/05 10:35  
Blogger suspiciousbastard spewed forth...

Gabrielle: I like the House of Mouse. Why did you say that their cartoons are getting poorer?

20/6/05 11:01  
Blogger Sancia spewed forth...

just dropping by 'cos I haven't been in the house for some time! hope you've been good joel. ROCK ON x)

20/6/05 13:34  
Anonymous Jayelle spewed forth...

hey there big fuck! i see you're getting back into the blogging mood despite your claims of being out of it for awhile;P nice one, this.

btw! i did the kenny sg. quiz and I came out as Big Fuck:D have u found the result yet??:D

And enjoy it la k? dad's paying. happy, happy.

20/6/05 15:27  
Blogger Adrian spewed forth...

I never liked Disney cartoons much. They present such an unrealistic view of the world. I suspect they're in some way responsible for the disillusionment of an entire generation.

20/6/05 21:29  
Blogger Darth Sidious spewed forth...

heh.. i agree.

Well, parasites thrive don't they!
One up to parasites!

21/6/05 03:16  
Anonymous Mingzhu spewed forth...

awwww... Disney!!!
You are there, and you are not paying for it. So don't complain.
Just Enjoy! ^_^

I'm sooo jealous. hehe.

22/6/05 02:23  
Blogger Teenage Lolita spewed forth...

I was at universal studio, yesterday. =) Japan. Lucky, i got my ticket paid for.

22/6/05 06:02  
Blogger nadnut spewed forth...

how was the trip? :)

22/6/05 07:10  
Blogger Gabrielle spewed forth...

i prefer the old ones.. like mermaid, cinderella... haha..

I dunno, these days disney hardly do cartoons, more teeny booper stories played by wanna-be teen actresses.

Where's the magic??

22/6/05 10:47  
Anonymous Anonymous spewed forth...

True. Where is the magic? Seems like it fizzled out with Mulan.

Man. ENJOY the blissful life of a parasite while it lasts. Extract as much pleasure as you can, I say.

Make it worth the $900 and drag the 'rents to every ride, dignity be damned. ;)


22/6/05 15:49  
Blogger suspiciousbastard spewed forth...

Gabrielle: You don't see the disney cartoons nowadays? They can be quite funny.

24/6/05 09:38  
Blogger J Schnorng spewed forth...

9: if you knew how i drive, you'd add 'foolhardy'.

zhiyang: oh, i disagree. you see, in japan, they all speak JAPANESE. this is automatically cool.

gabrielle: haha...not that i'm boasting, but to be fair, for me, it's more like a four times in a lifetime sort of thing. ok, maybe i'm boasting just a little bit.

sb: they are getting poorer. serious.

sancia: yes, drop by more often. i like it when pretty girls leave messages. i've been very, very good lately, you know.

jayelle: aiyoh, i really have been out of it. i've been a bad, bad blogger.

AQ; but what about the sex? oh wait, that's not disney, is it. shit.

darth sid: yes, until their host croaks. i am very scared of this.

zhuzhu: time i bring you lah.

lolita: japan? bring me leh! i want to go also.

nad: it was pretty cool, except i was with my family. which was cool in some ways too i guess. nonetheless, i could have used more beer.

jen: oh, trust me, it was worth every penny. ok, maybe not, but i sure had fun.

27/6/05 06:22  
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9/11/05 07:31  
Anonymous Anonymous spewed forth...

I recently went to Florida on vacation. The first week we stayed in Orlando. After three days of just walking arround and going to Buffalo Wild Wings every night we went to the Tourist Information stand because we weren't interested in going to theme parks. When we asked what else is to do besides the parks, the woman from the Tourist Information looked for like 3 minutes at us ending whith the words: what the fuck are u guys doing here? People travel hundreds of miles just to get here.... Where u guys from? The Netherlands. ....Mmmmm okay...
"What the fuck would that supposed to mean" was going through my mind as I walked towards the exit.

This big fuck u goes out to Orlando since there was nothing too besides going for a sightseeing tour through the swamps lurking for a fucking croc to show up.

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