Thursday, March 24, 2005

As some of you may have noticed, I've made minor changes to the layout of this site; I've also put up a couple more buttons (RSS feeds, voting links - be sure to click them ALL) as well as a little box showing how you can put a stylo milo button on your site linking to mine. Yes, I know you want to do it - don't think; just do it! Anyway, let me know if any of these template tweaks look stupid with your respective browsers, so I can fix all these problems; I use firefox, so I'm not sure if the site will look the same on, say, microsoft's internet sucksplorer.

Ok, back to business. So, as some of you may know, I've recently been fairly obsessed with Singapore blogging sensation Cheng Yan Yan, because she is, well, damn attractive (Oh! Those cuss words! Those curls! That tongue that spawned an internet phenomena!); I even drew a picture of her:



Nice, right? Some of you might be thinking, 'I don't believe this stupid fucker can draw.' You are wrong! I can draw very nice! Here's a picture I drew of myself:



Yes, that's right; I have sunglasses that say 'bad ass'. I'm just that much of a badass. Oh, just so you know, I quit smoking just over a week ago, so that's one of the last pictures I'll have with ciggies.

Anyway, back to my internet crush. So some of my snobby chicago friends, after reading xiaxue's blog, talked about how she wasn't that attractive, or used too much makeup, etc etc. I suppose it's true that she isn't exactly the most attractive woman in the world, but I think all this 'so and so isn't all that attractive' bullshit is getting just a little out of hand.

Let's face it, people. The majority of the world isn't that attractive. Seriously. There are a couple reasons why everyone's standards are so ridiculously high:

1) TV / the mass media: The problem with all this shit is that we see beautiful women / men every day. This makes us think, 'ah, since the world is so beautiful, I should be able to get someone good looking.' Let me tell you, this is a shining example of stupid thinking. Here's a news flash for the deluded: the beautiful people on tv are almost NEVER going to go out with you. It just won't happen, man! I used to dream about dating that girl from My Sassy Girl; it took me damn long to realize it would never happen. I was sad for a whole week. So, yeah, the majority of us will just have to be happy dating the average looking people we find.

2) The availability heuristic. Ok, this is a phenomenon in Social Psychology, which basically means that the easier something is to recall, the more common you think it is. Anyway, what this means is, since you find it easier to remember the pretty people that you see, you think they're more common. Thus, things work like this: you see pretty girl / handsome guy in Orchard / wherever. You find it easier to remember beautiful person (after all, they're beautiful). You thus think there are lots of beautiful people around. Haha! You are wrong! Next time you go out, open your eyes big big so you can see all the average looking people out there. Maybe you should even keep count of the average versus attractive people. The result? There are definitely less attractive people than average people.

Seriously, folks, this is an alarming trend. If all of us raise our standards so high, in the end, the whole world will end up chasing after the same 2 people or something. It will suck. Thus, I encourage all of you to find average people pretty.

I know, some of you will be saying, 'how the hell is this possible? Not attractive means not attractive, stupid!'

Fear not, I have a cunning plan!

See, there's this thing called the mere exposure effect; it's a really simple concept. Basically, the more you see something (or someone), the more you find it (or him, or her) attractive. No kidding. If you don't believe me, here's an experiment you can do it prove it.

1) Take this picture (an old picture of me from my NS days):




2) Print it out; even better rasterbate it first, and then print it out (on a side note, the rasterbator is an awesome program which you should check out regardless).

3) Put the picture somewhere you can see it every day.

After a couple weeks, you will probably think I am damn attractive. I know, some of you don't believe me; well, follow these instructions. I totally dare you.

So, anyway, back to the point. I think it would be damn awesome if we started a circle of people who just kept posting pictures of each other; then we would all seem more attractive. Just look at Mr. Miyagi; after posting so many pictures of himself, he begins getting wedding proposals and whatnot from random fans. This is clearly an example of the mere exposure effect. Here's my plan:

1) Everyone mail me their photos; the address to send things to is jschnorng@gmail.com.

2) Everyone post pictures of me in their blog and send me the link

3) I will reciprocally work in pictures of random bloggers in my blog

4) Do this with all your friends.

If it works out, everyone will become more attractive, because we keep seeing the same damn faces all the time. It will be awesome. Suddenly, we'll all seem a lot more attractive. I call it operation make everyone more attractive.

What do you guys think? Good idea, huh?

Awesome.

Before I sign out, I just saw a link to my blog in the comments section on some page written in an obscure language (incidentally, the post was a ripoff of a recent xiaxue post). Man, I love being quoted, especially when it's in a foreign language.

18 Comments:

Blogger enuwy spewed forth...

Just cruised by from your previous blog to find a sudden explosion of entries! good stuff. Anyway, all the best in your quest to make everyone attractive :p

24/3/05 18:29  
Anonymous peter spewed forth...

1. i know your drawing secret

2.xiaxue is pretty attractive... but she admits herself that she does photoshop her pictures. she's probably average good-looking. but I agree we all need to lower our standards.

24/3/05 19:47  
Blogger Adrian spewed forth...

Vectors?

Anyway, I've seen XX in real life before at Orchard Road but I didn't call her because I am *cough* shy by nature. She's quite attractive. Although very short.

24/3/05 20:47  
Blogger writ3r spewed forth...

some will always aim for the impossible.

even if the person isn't physically attractive but their inner beauty would be able to fill that up.

why have a gorgeous suit you can't fit in when you have a simple yet practical suit in your closet?

24/3/05 21:56  
Blogger Unknown spewed forth...

To each their own.

I'm probably very ugly in everyone's opinion now - in regards to your picture theory.

24/3/05 22:49  
Blogger sunflowr spewed forth...

Your exposure theory makes good sense. But...I already love myself enough and oh well, don't want to torture people with my photos! Will be back to check for peoples' faces. I like your blog.

24/3/05 23:18  
Blogger J Schnorng spewed forth...

Aiyah...at this rate, nobody's picture will go up. I guess we will all have to be content to be unattractive forever.

Also, of course Peter knows my drawing secret; he goes to school with me.

25/3/05 01:23  
Anonymous -J- spewed forth...

I realise her photoshop skills is excellent after I caught her at Cineleisure.

25/3/05 02:28  
Blogger suspiciousbastard spewed forth...

I'll mail some pictures of myself during school holidays.
Oh, and you draw better than me. Damn. I really have to improve mine.

25/3/05 06:49  
Blogger Lynnylchan spewed forth...

I've only seen your picture twice and already I think you're quite quirky cute. Any more and I'll probably add you to my rankings of guys...

25/3/05 06:50  
Blogger Adrian spewed forth...

groupie alert!
(just kidding)

25/3/05 07:14  
Blogger fansipan spewed forth...

Hi,

I'm from the "some pages". We used Vietnamese as the "obscure language" there. One of the girls there said that she admired you (and your writings), and intended to join your fan's club.

25/3/05 07:44  
Blogger sunflowr spewed forth...

fanclub? LOL..

25/3/05 10:33  
Blogger CELLE spewed forth...

BUt.. butt.. seeing the same person too many times can have a beastly effect ya know.. like how hubbies un-love their wives.. how gers get sian of their men..
no no?

25/3/05 13:35  
Blogger J Schnorng spewed forth...

-j-: Yeah, her photoshop skills might be fantastic, but that only makes her cooler.

sb: see? this idea is never ever going to work. I think forget it, lah.

lynnyl: hearing you say that, I figure I'm going to post pictures in, like, EVERY post. or maybe every other one. Awesome.

aq: groupies can only be a good thing. I mean, seriously.

fansipan: Big up to vietnam. I've always wanted to visit. If I had a fanclub there, I'd be over the moon; I mean, free accomodation! Woohoo!

Sunflowr: Fanclubs, like groupies, can only be a good thing.

Celle: I think hubbies unlove their wives not because of repeated exposure, but because of all the other things related to living together. It's also a matter of the associations you make, I guess. It's complicated. Suffice to say, I'm a firm believer in the fact that, if you just show pictures and pictures and pictures of the same person, eventually viewers will find that person more attractive. Really!

25/3/05 15:28  
Blogger fansipan spewed forth...

Guess some of you misunderstood me ... my bad English. I wanted to say that one girl there really liked your writing and your sense of humor. If there were such a fanclub, she would join it immediately :P

27/3/05 09:39  
Anonymous Anonymous spewed forth...

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